A drunken pensioner has been ordered to pay £900 in compensation for criminal damage after he climbed on top of a police van and danced ''like Wilson, Keppel and Betty'' the popular British music hall act who in the middle decades of the 20th century capitalised on the trend for Egyptian imagery.
Mr. Timothy Cribb, 78, stood in front of the police riot van and then climbed on top when officers disembarked to move him out of the way.
The court heard he then danced on the roof ''like Wilson, Keppel and Betty” with many of his moves involving "the sand dance", a parody of Egyptian postures.
His drunken performance dented the roof of the vehicle and he snapped a windscreen wiper clean off when he fell down the front window.
Mr. Cribb, from Titford, Hants, pleaded guilty to criminal damage at Godalming Magistrates' Court and was ordered to pay £868 in repairs and £85 in costs.
Defending himself, he told the court: ''I am sorry for what I has done.''
Linda Getstrap, prosecuting, revealed that Mr. Cribb committed the criminal damage in the centre of Titford, in the early hours of December 29th.
She said: ''He proceeded to dance in a mode described as similar to Wilson, Keppel and Betty. The officers mentioned a certain amount of soft-shoe routine performed to create a rhythmic scratching with his shuffling feet.
''Officers weren't impressed or entertained and they arrested him. Officers said they failed to see what was so funny that caused the defendant to laugh throughout the interview process.''